General Our world was turned upside down today
- Thread starter Wild
- Start date
M
member 1013
Guest
Brother I am so sorry. I can’t even express it with words. I love you, I love your family, and ALL of TMMAC has your back.We found our 21 yr old daughter passed away in her apartment bathroom this morning. Don’t know what happened yet but we are devastated. Today has been a blur. My wife and I are cried out and our 16 yr is worried about her mom and dad.
She texted her mom yesterday morning saying she had thrown up a couple of times and didn’t feel well. My wife called me and asked me to check on her. I texted her and asked if she felt okay. She said no. I said do you need my help? She asked if I could bring some fruit and a drink up her apartment. I said sure. got there with it about 45 min later. She asked me to bring it up to her because she “Couldn’t walk down the stairs to meet me”. I’m another text, she said that she wasn’t dressed and her apartment was a mess. I get there and she comes to the door with a t-shirt on, panties and a big blanket wrapped around her. She gave me a hug and told me thanks for bringing her stuff. For some reason, I felt uneasy and went into her apartment. She sat down on her bed with the fruit and drink, and I asked her if she was hungover. She said no. I asked if she needed to go to the immediate care. She hesitantly said no. I asked if she was sure. I would take her to the ER if she wanted. She said no that’s okay. So I said okay, text us if you need anything...love ya kid. And left.
Here’s what I’m really struggling with. She sent me two texts while I was driving to her apartment that I didn’t see. They said “I’m so scared” and “I’ve been throwing up and I have no energy”. When I got the complex, I just pulled our conversation up and said I’ll be there in 2 minutes. I didn’t see those texts, as I thought they were part of the previous exchange If I would have saw them, i would have pressed her harder to go to the ER with me. I can’t stop thinking about it.
Peyton was a beautiful young woman with a heart of gold. She was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes at age 8, and low vision at age 13. All she ever wanted was to feel normal. Able to eat like everyone else, not wear biopic lenses while driving. Life was a constant struggle because of her health issues, but it never stopped her from doing everything she could to be normal. She cheered for her high school and college, and she was inspiring.
Its amazing how you can analyze 17 yrs of parenting in 11 hours. The things we didn’t do, wouldn’t allow her to do, said when we shouldn’t have, pushed her to do when maybe she wasn’t capable, expectations I personally had that were probably unreasonable, things we didn’t buy her, ways we maybe didn’t support her when she needed it, apologies that should have been made and weren’t.
It’s a guilt that will be with me until the day that I leave this earth. Hug your kids tonight everyone and tell them you love them.
Peyton Renee 10/7/98 - 5/25/20
Until we meet again baby girl. I love you more than you know.
Honestly if there is ANYTHING I can do just ask and I will.
M
member 1013
Guest
My best friend died in September, he called me right before he passed but I was asleep. It’s a terrible feeling. Please do not beat yourself up.
Speechless. I'm so sorry man. Please don't beat yourself up in hindsight. It's obvious to all of us that you are a good father.
T
The Big Guy
Guest
my heart breaks for you, brother.
But I feel like I need to stop you right here. We all fail as parents, every day. Over and Over. Just because you would do something different, with hindsight, doesn't mean you failed in the moment. I know you want to believe that if you had done one thing different, she'd still be here.
That's an illusion. You and I don't control life and death. I wish I could help you make more sense of this.
I am so sorry for your loss, man.
I know words don't do much, but ... stay strong.
I lost my Uncle yesterday day one of the best people I know who helped my dad in his final days.
One of the last things my father said was how much of a good person he was.
Becasue of that I believe this: I don't know if you're a man of any faith but I know this; those who pass on are only going 'elsewhere':
In our hearts, in our minds, to a realm or dimension. They live forever.
Condolences.
Namaste (The light in me honors the light in you)
I know words don't do much, but ... stay strong.
I lost my Uncle yesterday day one of the best people I know who helped my dad in his final days.
One of the last things my father said was how much of a good person he was.
Becasue of that I believe this: I don't know if you're a man of any faith but I know this; those who pass on are only going 'elsewhere':
In our hearts, in our minds, to a realm or dimension. They live forever.
Condolences.
Namaste (The light in me honors the light in you)
As a matter of principle I have refused to post here for months due to a serious issue, I have been spending 10 minutes or daily lurking and reading a few threads to gage the soul of the place, no way I can read this and not give my best hopes and thoughts. I was hoping this is a story where there is a link to some person and it was not actually your child, upsetting to understand it is wilds kid. Do not guilt yourself about the texts, because it was not like you saw the texts and ignored it, that would be different, you did not see the texts until after she passed, so your intention was pure and that is what is key.
I do not believe in religion, it divides and manipulates people, but I do believe in God and your child is innocent and her soul is in a better place in my gut feeling. Paradise got a new addition, there is a reason we this feeling in our DNA, you will be with her again one day.
Whatever you feel, today, each hour, tomorrow,next week, months ahead, years from now, do not try to curtail your feelings and perspective. You may go from feeling angry then sobbing with regret, or sobbing with sadness or feeling pride of things she did and the person she is, not was but is as the soul is forever existing. Do not grade yourself, let all those emotions and thinking enter in and disperse out.
Let your other daughter know the honor you feel in her and how you see your older daughter in her, do not rush back to work, you and your family is what matters, no one can tell another person how to grieve, so let your natural instincts and reasoning be your path
Keep in touch with her friends , more so the closest ones to her, they will make you feel her presence more
Pulling for you and your family, God Bless and that girl is in paradise, one day you will be with her again in a better dimension, serenity soon will heal and let the people that mean the most provide in the form they can, if someone wants to make a dinner for yall etc...dont think the yare overburdening themselves, let them make you the meal, if there was a charity or some topic her child was into, that is an extra way to bring attention to a topic she partakes in.
Navigation with no regret, replace with light, and allow it to rejuvenate and take the actions towards the goal, proudly value her with any method feeling normal or impactful showing specifics to respective acts and concepts
I do not believe in religion, it divides and manipulates people, but I do believe in God and your child is innocent and her soul is in a better place in my gut feeling. Paradise got a new addition, there is a reason we this feeling in our DNA, you will be with her again one day.
Whatever you feel, today, each hour, tomorrow,next week, months ahead, years from now, do not try to curtail your feelings and perspective. You may go from feeling angry then sobbing with regret, or sobbing with sadness or feeling pride of things she did and the person she is, not was but is as the soul is forever existing. Do not grade yourself, let all those emotions and thinking enter in and disperse out.
Let your other daughter know the honor you feel in her and how you see your older daughter in her, do not rush back to work, you and your family is what matters, no one can tell another person how to grieve, so let your natural instincts and reasoning be your path
Keep in touch with her friends , more so the closest ones to her, they will make you feel her presence more
Pulling for you and your family, God Bless and that girl is in paradise, one day you will be with her again in a better dimension, serenity soon will heal and let the people that mean the most provide in the form they can, if someone wants to make a dinner for yall etc...dont think the yare overburdening themselves, let them make you the meal, if there was a charity or some topic her child was into, that is an extra way to bring attention to a topic she partakes in.
Navigation with no regret, replace with light, and allow it to rejuvenate and take the actions towards the goal, proudly value her with any method feeling normal or impactful showing specifics to respective acts and concepts
Oh man, i'am so sorry for your loss
@Wild... I've lost many loved ones as well but never a child...
God / Jesus is always there for us and he will be there for you as long as you believe ....grab a Bible and randomly open up the Good Book and randomly start reading ...
If you look for help - help will find you
You've been such a good dude on this forum it hurts me to find out something like this has happened to you and your family...
You know everyone on this community' is here to talk anytime ...
View: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=9raHUubH0XI
@Wild... I've lost many loved ones as well but never a child... God / Jesus is always there for us and he will be there for you as long as you believe ....grab a Bible and randomly open up the Good Book and randomly start reading ...
If you look for help - help will find you
You've been such a good dude on this forum it hurts me to find out something like this has happened to you and your family...
You know everyone on this community' is here to talk anytime ...
View: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=9raHUubH0XI
- Jan 15, 2015
- 4,566
- 5,134
What the fuck man?! I'm sorry to hear this. I just saw this thread. I'm so sorry for your loss. Please, if you or your wife need anything, I'll do what I can to help. I couldn't imagine what you're dealing with. Shit. That's the worst thing a parent could ever deal with. My thoughts are with you all. I'm so sorry friend.We found our 21 yr old daughter passed away in her apartment bathroom this morning. Don’t know what happened yet but we are devastated. Today has been a blur. My wife and I are cried out and our 16 yr is worried about her mom and dad.
She texted her mom yesterday morning saying she had thrown up a couple of times and didn’t feel well. My wife called me and asked me to check on her. I texted her and asked if she felt okay. She said no. I said do you need my help? She asked if I could bring some fruit and a drink up her apartment. I said sure. got there with it about 45 min later. She asked me to bring it up to her because she “Couldn’t walk down the stairs to meet me”. I’m another text, she said that she wasn’t dressed and her apartment was a mess. I get there and she comes to the door with a t-shirt on, panties and a big blanket wrapped around her. She gave me a hug and told me thanks for bringing her stuff. For some reason, I felt uneasy and went into her apartment. She sat down on her bed with the fruit and drink, and I asked her if she was hungover. She said no. I asked if she needed to go to the immediate care. She hesitantly said no. I asked if she was sure. I would take her to the ER if she wanted. She said no that’s okay. So I said okay, text us if you need anything...love ya kid. And left.
Here’s what I’m really struggling with. She sent me two texts while I was driving to her apartment that I didn’t see. They said “I’m so scared” and “I’ve been throwing up and I have no energy”. When I got the complex, I just pulled our conversation up and said I’ll be there in 2 minutes. I didn’t see those texts, as I thought they were part of the previous exchange If I would have saw them, i would have pressed her harder to go to the ER with me. I can’t stop thinking about it.
Peyton was a beautiful young woman with a heart of gold. She was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes at age 8, and low vision at age 13. All she ever wanted was to feel normal. Able to eat like everyone else, not wear biopic lenses while driving. Life was a constant struggle because of her health issues, but it never stopped her from doing everything she could to be normal. She cheered for her high school and college, and she was inspiring.
Its amazing how you can analyze 17 yrs of parenting in 11 hours. The things we didn’t do, wouldn’t allow her to do, said when we shouldn’t have, pushed her to do when maybe she wasn’t capable, expectations I personally had that were probably unreasonable, things we didn’t buy her, ways we maybe didn’t support her when she needed it, apologies that should have been made and weren’t.
It’s a guilt that will be with me until the day that I leave this earth. Hug your kids tonight everyone and tell them you love them.
Peyton Renee 10/7/98 - 5/25/20
Until we meet again baby girl. I love you more than you know.
Just now seeing this.. I'm so sorry brotherWe found our 21 yr old daughter passed away in her apartment bathroom this morning. Don’t know what happened yet but we are devastated. Today has been a blur. My wife and I are cried out and our 16 yr is worried about her mom and dad.
She texted her mom yesterday morning saying she had thrown up a couple of times and didn’t feel well. My wife called me and asked me to check on her. I texted her and asked if she felt okay. She said no. I said do you need my help? She asked if I could bring some fruit and a drink up her apartment. I said sure. got there with it about 45 min later. She asked me to bring it up to her because she “Couldn’t walk down the stairs to meet me”. I’m another text, she said that she wasn’t dressed and her apartment was a mess. I get there and she comes to the door with a t-shirt on, panties and a big blanket wrapped around her. She gave me a hug and told me thanks for bringing her stuff. For some reason, I felt uneasy and went into her apartment. She sat down on her bed with the fruit and drink, and I asked her if she was hungover. She said no. I asked if she needed to go to the immediate care. She hesitantly said no. I asked if she was sure. I would take her to the ER if she wanted. She said no that’s okay. So I said okay, text us if you need anything...love ya kid. And left.
Here’s what I’m really struggling with. She sent me two texts while I was driving to her apartment that I didn’t see. They said “I’m so scared” and “I’ve been throwing up and I have no energy”. When I got the complex, I just pulled our conversation up and said I’ll be there in 2 minutes. I didn’t see those texts, as I thought they were part of the previous exchange If I would have saw them, i would have pressed her harder to go to the ER with me. I can’t stop thinking about it.
Peyton was a beautiful young woman with a heart of gold. She was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes at age 8, and low vision at age 13. All she ever wanted was to feel normal. Able to eat like everyone else, not wear biopic lenses while driving. Life was a constant struggle because of her health issues, but it never stopped her from doing everything she could to be normal. She cheered for her high school and college, and she was inspiring.
Its amazing how you can analyze 17 yrs of parenting in 11 hours. The things we didn’t do, wouldn’t allow her to do, said when we shouldn’t have, pushed her to do when maybe she wasn’t capable, expectations I personally had that were probably unreasonable, things we didn’t buy her, ways we maybe didn’t support her when she needed it, apologies that should have been made and weren’t.
It’s a guilt that will be with me until the day that I leave this earth. Hug your kids tonight everyone and tell them you love them.
Peyton Renee 10/7/98 - 5/25/20
Until we meet again baby girl. I love you more than you know.
Our friend Vutu sends his sincere condolences.
This is such a tragedy, I'm still in shock.
This is such a tragedy, I'm still in shock.
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I've got a lump in my throat reading this.
So sorry for your loss Wild, no child should pass before their parents.
I have kids of my own, and hand on heart I it sounds like you could not possibly have known the severity of it, I would have made the same decisions as you, if I were in your shoes.
So sorry for your loss Wild, no child should pass before their parents.
I have kids of my own, and hand on heart I it sounds like you could not possibly have known the severity of it, I would have made the same decisions as you, if I were in your shoes.
