General Lizzo The Land Whale

TheAwkwardTitan · Mar 3, 2020

Lets say I don't like showering and smell like shit all day like

@Conor McGregor nut holder. Would I then start a social movement to promote smelling like shit positivity? Would everyone be ignorant for acknowledging that I smell like a prolapsed anus? No i'd smell like shit. Lizzo you look like sunbaked garbage and you're lucky you can sing because regular bathtubs weren't made for baby elephants. Stop contributing to stupid social movements that do nothing but stop you from bettering yourself. Fatty.

Back in the day people thought of their grandma to last longer during sex. Now we think of Lizzo.

BeardOfKnowledge · Mar 3, 2020

I'd like to subscribe to your newsletter.

BenAskrensStrikingcoach · Mar 3, 2020

What is this creature

silentsinger · Mar 3, 2020

Just had to google her. She plays the flute. I play the flute!

BenAskrensStrikingcoach · Mar 3, 2020

silentsinger said:
Just had to google her. She plays the flute. I play the flute!

Fuck googling that shit, my phone would shatter under the weight of the results.

Is it some sort of new species of sea creature, based on OPs picture it seems to be a predator for the kraken.

silentsinger · Mar 3, 2020

The Kurgan said:
Fuck googling that shit, my phone would shatter under the weight of the results.

Is it some sort of new species of sea creature, based on OPs picture it seems to be a predator for the kraken.

Even in my larger years I could barely swim, she looks pretty buoyant though.

Malakas · Mar 3, 2020

It is rough going from the Jessica Biel thread to this . I'm not OK.

BenAskrensStrikingcoach · Mar 3, 2020

silentsinger said:
Even in my larger years I could barely swim, she looks pretty buoyant though.

We will only know when it is disected, is it a bottom feeder?

Freeloading Rusty · Mar 3, 2020

silentsinger said:
Just had to google her. She plays the flute. I play the flute!

Not the skin flute.

silentsinger · Mar 3, 2020

The Kurgan said:
We will only know when it is disected, is it a bottom feeder?

I feel a bit bad for poking fun, thankfully the chances of her stumbling on this thread are slim to none and I was never THAT big, but I did spend some years pretty overweight.

Catfish?

BenAskrensStrikingcoach · Mar 3, 2020

silentsinger said:
Just had to google her. She plays the flute. I play the flute!

I think thats a typo, suposed to be flatulist rather than flautist, would explain the bouyancy issue.

silentsinger · Mar 3, 2020

The Kurgan said:
I think thats a typo, suposed to be flatulist rather than flautist, would explain the bouyancy issue.

Actual IRL LOL. That was bloody quick too!

kristian82 · Mar 3, 2020

One them dumb bitches that says I'm not fat, I'm fluffy.

Hauler · Mar 3, 2020

This is mean-spirited

BenAskrensStrikingcoach · Mar 3, 2020

silentsinger said:
I feel a bit bad for poking fun, thankfully the chances of her stumbling on this thread are slim to none and I was never THAT big, but I did spend some years pretty overweight.

Catfish?

My god, its sentient?

Ready the harpoons Queequeg

BenAskrensStrikingcoach · Mar 3, 2020

Hauler said:
This is mean-spirited

Agreed, abandon thread

silentsinger · Mar 3, 2020

The Kurgan said:
My god, its sentient?

Ready the harpoons Queequeg

Sent me to Google again. I feel pretty low brow having never read it.

BenAskrensStrikingcoach · Mar 3, 2020

silentsinger said:
Sent me to Google again. I feel pretty low brow having never read it.

I haven't read Moby Dick in years, I had to google the name myself, I thought Queequeg was Pequod, I blame Song for making me play MGSV again.

silentsinger · Mar 3, 2020

The Kurgan said:
I haven't read Moby Dick in years, I had to google the name myself, I thought Queequeg was Pequod, I blame Song for making me play MGSV again.

K, I don't feel low brow for having to google a computer game, haha.

Le Chat Noir · Mar 3, 2020

Guys are chicks, fat is healthy, Bernie is a viable candidate, etc... it's as if the world has gone insane.

Le Chat Noir
©

BenAskrensStrikingcoach · Mar 3, 2020

silentsinger said:
K, I don't feel low brow for having to google a computer game, haha.

No, the Helicopter in MGSV is named after the boat in Moby Dick, it was in my head ao I thought that was Ahabs main man on the harpoon, you dig?

BenAskrensStrikingcoach · Mar 3, 2020

Le Chat Noir said:
Guys are chicks, fat is healthy, Bernie is a viable candidate, etc... it's as if the world has gone insane.

Le Chat Noir
©

Well on the plus side it will all sort its self out in a generation or 2, dead heart attack victims and sterile mental cases don't produce offspring.

Le Chat Noir · Mar 3, 2020

The Kurgan said:
Well on the plus side it will all sort its self out in a generation or 2, dead heart attack victims and sterile mental cases don't produce offspring.

Le Chat Noir
©

BenAskrensStrikingcoach · Mar 3, 2020

Le Chat Noir said:
Le Chat Noir
©

Sanders is also a decrepit old bastard, I said last year he'd be dead by 2020, lets see if he makes it to the end of the year.

NotBanjaxo · Mar 3, 2020

Finally, a study that confirms what I knew all along: fat acceptance

According to the author of this article, fat shaming is bad, as it causes stress which leads to comfort eating. She also refers to the idea that obesity is putting the NHS under strain as "spurious."

General Lizzo The Land Whale

IQ = 209

The Most Consistent Motherfucker You Know

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Here comes Rover, sniffin’ at your ass

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Been fallin so long it's like gravitys gone

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