Personal A thread about regrets

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Mix6APlix

Mix6APlix

The more you cry, the less I care.
Oct 20, 2015
12,918
13,449
I've never told anyone this. Family, friends, anyone.

When my dad died when I was 12, we were arguing about some bullshit that happened at school. My last words to him were "I hope you die". 72 hours later, he was found on the bathroom floor of his hotel room (He was a pilot) in dallas.

That's some pretty heavy shit to carry for 28 years, and likely for the rest of my life.

Also not putting my Rott to sleep, even though I knew her time was up. If my family had convinced me to do do, I would never have forgiven them. But I was selfish and stupid. Now the only one I will never forgive is myself.
 
Lord Vutulaki

Lord Vutulaki

Banned
Jan 16, 2015
16,651
5,956
speaking as a father we expect our kids to hate us at times, it comes with the job (if youre doing it right) so I wouldnt beat myself up too much over what you said to you dad mate, Im sure he's not giving a fuck anymore haha

The most humane thing Ive witnessed was my dad putting our GSD down with a hammer blow to the head.
 
Ghost Bro

Ghost Bro

Wololo ~Leave no turn unstoned
Nov 13, 2015
8,511
10,828
Its tough but you gotta let some of that shit go dude..what you said had no effect on the outcome, you blame yourself because that's what you have control over
 
Disciplined Galt

Disciplined Galt

Disciplina et Frugalis
First 100
Jan 15, 2015
26,030
30,881
Didn't get my dad a gift for his birthday, figured I'd give something to him later. Two days later he died.
 
Splinty

Splinty

Shake 'em off
Admin
Dec 31, 2014
44,116
91,096
Age 13 to 20 I was hell on wheels and, in an adult retrospect, almost assuredly depressed and internalizing it and hiding it away.
I was in bad schools and just a dickhead to so many people as a defense mechanism for my own destroyed ego. I felt bad about even when 'i won'.

20-25 was probably half and half as I learned new habits and behaviors, trying to follow a path that was what I wanted instead of what I was doing (and was easier).

I wish I could go tell the dozens of people how sorry I am for being such a dickhead. It was all me. A couple were, again in retrospect, just as angry and depressed with life as I was. Some of those are dead now.

Make amends in real time.
 
Yossarian

Yossarian

TMMAC Addict
Oct 25, 2015
13,489
19,127
Most regrets we have about decisions we weren't equipped to make at the time, but finally gained the insight to deal with them. It's a cruel thing, to knwo the answer to things of the past. It's best to apply this insight right now and tomorrow, so we don;t have this same moment 10 years from now. You have regrets because you cared enough, and that is a good thing. Forgive yourself for it.
 
SongExotic2

SongExotic2

ATM 3 CHAMPION OF THE WORLD. #FREECAIN
First 100
Jan 16, 2015
39,771
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I regret my DUI. Stupid thing to do. Gotta fly back the next few weekends to do just Saturday community service, on my own dime too. This shit is gonna cost me 20 grand by the time I get all clear and that includes moving to another state and never driving in California again. Otherwise I'd have to quit my job and do 9 months of classes to get my call license back.

Don't do it folks


Just get an Uber.
 
Splinty

Splinty

Shake 'em off
Admin
Dec 31, 2014
44,116
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Song2054 said:
I regret my DUI. Stupid thing to do. Gotta fly back the next few weekends to do just Saturday community service, on my own dime too. This shit is gonna cost me 20 grand by the time I get all clear and that includes moving to another state and never driving in California again. Otherwise I'd have to quit my job and do 9 months of classes to get my call license back.

Don't do it folks


Just get an Uber.
Click to expand...

Do you regret it... Or just getting caught?
 
SongExotic2

SongExotic2

ATM 3 CHAMPION OF THE WORLD. #FREECAIN
First 100
Jan 16, 2015
39,771
53,674
Splinty said:
Do you regret it... Or just getting caught?
Click to expand...
No regret it. There's no need for it and if you can afford to go out drinking booze you can get a Uber.

I had a warped perception of what was okay to drive (the night I got busted I wasnt fucked up by my standard but I was still way over)

Could have been much worse tho.
 
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maurice

maurice

Posting Machine
Oct 21, 2015
1,361
2,295


My oldest is 11, so he's starting his journey into wanting to fight with me about dumb shit. I don't mind, really. His only specific complaint is that I tell him what to do sometimes and don't let him do whatever he wants literally 100% of them time. The obvious response is that only terrible parents do that. I also point out that he gets more and more self-determination every year and, in only 7 more years, he can do whatever the fuck he wants with my full blessing.

I think he'll understand one day...but not for while. And I think Mix's dad probably understood too.
 
Mix6APlix

Mix6APlix

The more you cry, the less I care.
Oct 20, 2015
12,918
13,449
maurice said:


My oldest is 11, so he's starting his journey into wanting to fight with me about dumb shit. I don't mind, really. His only specific complaint is that I tell him what to do sometimes and don't let him do whatever he wants literally 100% of them time. The obvious response is that only terrible parents do that. I also point out that he gets more and more self-determination every year and, in only 7 more years, he can do whatever the fuck he wants with my full blessing.

I think he'll understand one day...but not for while. And I think Mix's dad probably understood too.
Click to expand...
Have you tried smacking him in the face?
 
silentsinger

silentsinger

Momofuku
Jun 23, 2015
21,038
14,484
My Dad was a chef in the army, he made the most beutiful intricate wedding cakes on the side.

He did the most beautiful trellis work on this cake and it was out to set, and I put a big fucking thumb print on it. I swore to god it wasn't me that did it and because I was daddy's sweetheart and my mother's little girl the cat got blamed for it.

What on earth possessed me to do that I don't know, but 8 year old me? You're a dick. The fact I think about it so frequently now.
 
1

1031

Guest
Yossarian said:
Most regrets we have about decisions we weren't equipped to make at the time, but finally gained the insight to deal with them. It's a cruel thing, to knwo the answer to things of the past. It's best to apply this insight right now and tomorrow, so we don;t have this same moment 10 years from now. You have regrets because you cared enough, and that is a good thing. Forgive yourself for it.
Click to expand...
Again dude, nothing but articulated class in your posts.
 
1

1031

Guest
My regrets involve, at their root:
  1. The things I didn't do.
  2. Things left unsaid.
  3. Potential unseen.
  4. Forgiveness withheld.
  5. Listened too late.
  6. Confidence was lacking.
  7. Absent ambition.
  8. Undisciplined.

And now what?
Shall I just go on regretting? How long shall I imprison myself?
The point of spending time in prison isn't simply to serve time; we must leave rehabilitated.
I ask myself what it means to learn a lesson and then ask myself if I've done that.
I tell myself "If the answer is yes then you're free to leave, if the answer is no then you're still free to leave.
Any time you want."
 
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Yossarian

Yossarian

TMMAC Addict
Oct 25, 2015
13,489
19,127
blank said:
  • The things I didn't do.
  • Things left unsaid.
  • Potential unseen.
  • Forgiveness withheld.
  • Listened too late.
  • Confidence was lacking.
  • Absent ambition.
  • Undisciplined.
Click to expand...
All these things, except #2. Should be for me: Things said too often :)
 
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