Lifestyle Anyone ever know a pyro?

[Mix6APlix]

Back in high school I was good friends with a kid a few houses down. We hung out a lot, got drunk and stoned, and did all the shit we did. But for years I never knew he was the culprit behind the burning of portajohns at our local park that had been happening for years.

So it's the night that Paxton hit the championship game winner for The Bulls, and we go out to the park to get baked and drink some frosty pilsners.

After we do, he says he needs to take a piss, but as he goes into the portajohn, he tells me to keep a look out.

About 2 minutes later, he comes out and tells me to check this out. "This" was the way he had strung up toilet paper up all the corners of the portajohn.

He actually had a Zippo engraved with "Brew Porta".

He did the little Zippo flip light, and proceeded to light up each streams of toilet paper. Then said, "we should go".

So we ran back into the soccer fields, sat on the bleachers and watched as the fire dept. and cops arrived to extinguish the burning tub of piss and shit while we smoked another bowl.

I had known him for 4-5 years, and had no idea that he was behind this, which happened numerous times every summer.

 

[silentsinger]

My mad-as-a-box-of-frogs ex boyfriend burned my house down, does that count?

 

[Hauler]

Your buddy sounds like he is a real asshole.

 

[Hauler]

My mad-as-a-box-of-frogs ex boyfriend burned my house down, does that count?

Yes. That counts.

 

[Hauler]

I like sitting around a fire. I also like to light fires in unique ways - like soaking an unlit bonfire in gas then shooting a Molotov cocktail with a shotgun, sending the flames into the bonfire fumes where it erupts in a huge flame of epicness. I also like blowing shit up. Think tannerite + a round from an AR.

But I've never burned anything down in a destructive way that resulted in the fire department being called.

Well, other than that time I put a bucket of Thompson's Water Seal on a fire and it exploded. It made quite an impressive mushroom cloud and lit a tree on fire in my buddy's backyard. But we had it out before the fire department showed up so all was well. Scared the shit out of us though - I had no idea it was going to explode like that.

 

[Mix6APlix]

Your buddy sounds like he is a real asshole.

He was, and likely still is.

 

[Mix6APlix]

He actually stranded me at the United Center after a Blackhawks game for calling him an honorless birch for smoking when he had a 250 dollar bet with his dad (Same dad that I beat on his home table while shooting the entire game of pool left handed like Inigo Montoya.) that he could go 30 days without a cigarette.

The UC is like a block or two away from Malcolm X college, and he stranded me there at 11pm, before I ever was constantly armed.

 

[Nemo?]

Nope... buddies wife is a kleptomaniac though.

 

[ECC170]

I burned my house down @3 years of age.. true story, I can remember doing it actually.. Was 3 days before xmas as well in 1988..

 

[Filthy]

had a friend who lived down the gravel road a bit. His dad was EOD (Explosive Ordnance Disposal) in the army, and had a couple books on IEDs (this is the late 80s).

So naturally we started building some pipe bombs and what-nots. Then we found a 'recipe' for DIY-Napalm. So we mixed up about a 5 gallon bucket in an old chicken coop (our bomb shop). We flung it around and marveled at how it stuck to everything. Then decided to light a little glob.

The fire quickly got out of control, caught our bucket on fire, and burned the chicken coop to the ground. Literally. A small layer of ashes and nails was all that was left. We disavowed any knowledge of how it happened, but the EOD books disappeared from the book shelf the next day.

 

[Jesus X]

I went to school with a kid who set an enormous trash can at school on fire in front of like 500 kids.

it was a huge blaze that trash was flammable AF the fire dept was called and the kid was arrested,it was actually entertaining.