General Middle aged man obsessed with Facebook

[mysticmac]

So last night I hung out with a buddy who is in his mid 40's and obsessed with Facebook. He's the only grown man that I know that really gives a fuck about it. He's on it all the time. He complains about his phone's battery life, then jacks up the screen on time out so he can put his phone down but still read posts as they come in.

He is socially awkward in abnormal ways even among socially awkward standards. He comes up with weird social rules that nobody has ever heard of, then gets mad at people for not conforming to them. He's given me passive aggressive shit before because we went to two places that he checked us both into on FB, but I only liked one of the posts. WTF?

But the grand daddy of them all for him is when he unfriends someone. The f'n guy won't shut up about how he had to do it because they are such an awful person. He went off on this last night, and I instantly wanted to stab myself in the eye with a fork just so I had an excuse to exit the conversation.

YOU'RE A GROWN MAN! GET OVER IT!

Anywho, there is no real point to this post. I just thought I'd let you know about the weird people I hang out with (other than you fuckers).

 

[SongExotic2]

@john2054 he's talking shit about you m8

 

[member 1013]

TMMAC is my facebook

I just unfriended @Splinty and @Wild

 

[1031]

take him to do more real shit.
he's lonely and has no idea how to accept his past mistakes.
I have no idea what I'm talking about, I'm just projecting

 

[Passive Jay]

Facebook is great for connecting you with people you dont see anymore (friends from the past, family members that dont live close) and keeping you updated on stuff in their lives, other than that I just use it as another source of entertainment (i.e. memes, people freaking out on facebook). But some people take it way too seriously.

 

[mysticmac]

take him to do more real shit.
he's lonely and has no idea how to accept his past mistakes.
I have no idea what I'm talking about, I'm just projecting

That's the thing. I do that, but he spends the entire time reading FB on his phone.

Last summer it was really hot in the valley, so I decide I'm going to head to the coast. Me and my other buddy are going to go, then I think I should invite OP buddy and do so. The three of us head out there. In the car he immediately asks to charge his phone, but I'm using the GPS and tell him to F off with that shit. Then we get to the coast and end up at a bar for some beers. He b lines for a seat near an outlet to charge his phone and get on FB. Me and buddy #2 are ordering a couple of samples with each round and sharing them so we can get a taste of as many as possible. Eventually the waiter told us that if we ordered any more samples, he'd charge us for a sample tray. We (buddy #2 and I) laughed about getting cut off from samples.

The next day, buddy #2 posted something about it on FB and buddy #1 commented "When did that happen?" HE WAS SITTING RIGHT F'N THERE. GET OFF YOUR PHONE AND HANG OUT WITH THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU! He had no idea it happened until it happened on FB.

 

[BeardOfKnowledge]

Icarus.

 

[1031]

That's the thing. I do that, but he spends the entire time reading FB on his phone.

Last summer it was really hot in the valley, so I decide I'm going to head to the coast. Me and my other buddy are going to go, then I think I should invite OP buddy and do so. The three of us head out there. In the car he immediately asks to charge his phone, but I'm using the GPS and tell him to F off with that shit. Then we get to the coast and end up at a bar for some beers. He b lines for a seat near an outlet to charge his phone and get on FB. Me and buddy #2 are ordering a couple of samples with each round and sharing them so we can get a taste of as many as possible. Eventually the waiter told us that if we ordered any more samples, he'd charge us for a sample tray. We (buddy #2 and I) laughed about getting cut off from samples.

The next day, buddy #2 posted something about it on FB and buddy #1 commented "When did that happen?" HE WAS SITTING RIGHT F'N THERE. GET OFF YOUR PHONE AND HANG OUT WITH THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU! He had no idea it happened until it happened on FB.

You're a good friend with the patience of an angel.

 

[mysticmac]

You're a good friend with the patience of an angel.

Not so fast. I nearly took his head off one night. He unfriended me after that.

 

[kneeblock]

There is a delicious irony to posting about this on an online forum.

 

[Shinkicker]

Not so fast. I nearly took his head off one night. He unfriended me after that.

But you're back together, right?

 

[mysticmac]

But you're back together, right?

BFFs 4 life.

 

[Shinkicker]

There is a delicious irony to posting about this on an online forum.

And beautifully ironic that you see the irony.

 

[Nemo?]

I think of this every time the internet gets real and people get butt hurt.

 

[Tiiimmmaaayyy]

FB sucks ass. I tried it for a short time then deactivated the account. My wife is pretty obsessed with it tho. I'm probably the strange one because I usually go the other way when I'm in the community and see someone I went to high school with. If I don't wanna talk to them in real life I don't give a shit about seeing their stupid posts about random shit. I would rather spend my time in here bitching about it with people I've never met. Yup, I'm a weirdo.