General Mix6APlix, I challenge you

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Leigh

Leigh

Engineer
Pro Fighter
Jan 26, 2015
10,925
21,293
We might seem very different but we both did a load of dumb, funny stuff in our time. So let's go story for story. You've already posted a few, so I'll start.

From the ages of about 9-12 I used to dress up as a ninja and create ninja missions for myself. These usually involved harassing people with projectiles in the dark. One night, I snuck out of my bedroom at 2am by climbing down a drain pipe, went to my friends house and climbed in through his bedroom window. He wasn't there as he was camping in his garden. So I went down stairs to leave but the door was locked and someone came down the stairs, so I jumped out the window.

My friend's dad chased me in his car, so I threw a homemade smoke bomb (talcum powder) across his windscreen and ran away into the dark. They were pretty pissed off but I denied it was me.

As well as smoke bombs, I had other homemade ninja weapons, including shurikens, swords and climbing claws. When I lived in Hong Kong, I had a ninja gang and we would harass the security guys. The police came round to my house after my brother (who was 8 at the time) swung a chain at a woman. My dad laughed at them and told them to fuck off cos we were just little kids. It came to head when I saw a guy playing with his daughter in their garden and I threw a large circular saw blade at them (wtf?). Luckily I missed but the fallout from that scuppered my ninja plans for a while.

Your turn.
 
Robbie Hart

Robbie Hart

All Biden Voters Are Mindless Sheep
Feb 13, 2015
49,805
50,770
The quoting of another member is an old function which notifies the user you wish to invite them into your conversation/thread........
Like this
Mix6APlix @Mix6APlix
 
Robbie Hart

Robbie Hart

All Biden Voters Are Mindless Sheep
Feb 13, 2015
49,805
50,770
Leigh said:
We might seem very different but we both did a load of dumb, funny stuff in our time. So let's go story for story. You've already posted a few, so I'll start.

From the ages of about 9-12 I used to dress up as a ninja and create ninja missions for myself. These usually involved harassing people with projectiles in the dark. One night, I snuck out of my bedroom at 2am by climbing down a drain pipe, went to my friends house and climbed in through his bedroom window. He wasn't there as he was camping in his garden. So I went down stairs to leave but the door was locked and someone came down the stairs, so I jumped out the window.

My friend's dad chased me in his car, so I threw a homemade smoke bomb (talcum powder) across his windscreen and ran away into the dark. They were pretty pissed off but I denied it was me.

As well as smoke bombs, I had other homemade ninja weapons, including shurikens, swords and climbing claws. When I lived in Hong Kong, I had a ninja gang and we would harass the security guys. The police came round to my house after my brother (who was 8 at the time) swung a chain at a woman. My dad laughed at them and told them to fuck off cos we were just little kids. It came to head when I saw a guy playing with his daughter in their garden and I threw a large circular saw blade at them (wtf?). Luckily I missed but the fallout from that scuppered my ninja plans for a while.

Your turn.
Click to expand...
These are rather weak stories, except for the last one (which is extremely worrying).....was expecting groups of kids to be mangled, parents crying, etc
 
Leigh

Leigh

Engineer
Pro Fighter
Jan 26, 2015
10,925
21,293
Robbie Hart said:
These are rather weak stories, except for the last one (which is extremely worrying).....was expecting groups of kids to be mangled, parents crying, etc
Click to expand...
I'm not blowing my wad in the first round.

But you broke into a house at 2am when you were 11 years old and smoke bombed the car that chased you?
 
Robbie Hart

Robbie Hart

All Biden Voters Are Mindless Sheep
Feb 13, 2015
49,805
50,770
Leigh said:
I'm not blowing my wad in the first round.

But you broke into a house at 2am when you were 11 years old and smoke bombed the car that chased you?
Click to expand...
I've done 1 million times worse but don't have time to reveal all the details now. This is between you and sir pixalot
 
Mix6APlix

Mix6APlix

The more you cry, the less I care.
Oct 20, 2015
12,918
13,449
Lick my taint. I've shared most of my stories.

When I got my ass beat for throwing snowballs at a car, you'd think I learned a lesson. Nope. Too fucking stupid.

So me and two buddies are throwing snowballs at cars, and 1 of these dipshits decide to put a rock in the snowball.

Oh and is it just some guy whose van he hits? Of course not, it's an off duty cop. He drives on, but only to get position. Totally flanks us, and come charging over the hill with an 18 inch or so Maglite like some angry ogre. Tackles both of the guys I was with.

Last time I was throwing snowballs, I got caught. This time I got away.

Ended up getting back to my friends house and told his parents about the sociopath that just abducted their son into their rape van.

Well, once we got to the police station, we found out that he was an off duty cop. You'd think I'd had been smart enough to leave my hand made nunchucks behind. But I wasnt.

None of us got charged, we just agreed to pay for damages, and the cop was pretty cool about it. But the fucker stole my chucks. I should have kicked him in the nuts, but I had enough shit to deal with by this point.
 
Leigh

Leigh

Engineer
Pro Fighter
Jan 26, 2015
10,925
21,293
Ok, I too have a snowball story. I might have posted it before.

I was walking home from work a few years ago and two kids walk past me with snowballs in their hands. It's obvious they are going to throw them at me, which they did. They missed though. I wanted to slap them but knew they'd run if I chased them, so I called them names and pretended to run, to wind them up in the hopes they would chase me. I said they couldn't hit me with a snow ball and I hope his boyfriend is a better shot etc.

Well they came running after me. I ducked around a corner, took off my jacket and when they came around, the little one put his hands up to fight and fronted me. I kicked him in the guts, pulled his hoodie over his head hockey style and gave him a couple of digs. His mate wanted no part of it.

Then it turned surreal. I saw a guy on a moped stop and turn around. He gets on the pavement and runs into me. I manage to turn and grab him and his bike goes down the pavement, he goes down the pavement and I'm left with a crash helmet in my hands. We all look at each other and realise it's got a bit out of hand. I smash the helmet on the floor and tell them to fuck off and we go our separate ways.

------------

A couple of weeks later I see the kid again. I'm in Tescos and he stands in the door way staring at me, rapping to his ipod. I ignore him. I see him a few more times and he keeps giving me dirty looks.

------------

Spring rolls around and I have my shirt off. I am much more muscular than I look in a winter coat. I see the kid again and ask him why he keeps giving me dirty looks. He denies it.

------------

One of my students is friends with him. Tells him his instructor fights MMA and the kid says he'd like to train. Student shows him my fights and the kid recognises me and says, "Hmm, that's probably not for me."

------------

The cool part

Kid comes up to me in the street one day and apologises. Asks if he can train. I say yes. He comes down and is quite a natural. After a few weeks he stops training. I see him and ask him why. He says he'd love to continue but he lives in a hostel as his mum moved to Wales and he hasn't got any money. Turns out he's from a broken home and life's been pretty shit to him, really. I say he can clean the gym for training fees. He jumps at the offer. Starts training, gets really good, starts competing amateur and tearing it up. Has a couple of pro fights and does well. We've been very good friends for the past 6-7 years.
 
Mix6APlix

Mix6APlix

The more you cry, the less I care.
Oct 20, 2015
12,918
13,449
And for the record, I still have ninja garb. The only time I haven't been a ninja for Halloween in the last 20 years was when I was Jack Burton.
 
Leigh

Leigh

Engineer
Pro Fighter
Jan 26, 2015
10,925
21,293
Mix6APlix said:
And for the record, I still have ninja garb. The only time I haven't been a ninja for Halloween in the last 20 years was when I was Jack Burton.
Click to expand...
You don't have kids. Where do you go in your ninja outfit?
 
Mix6APlix

Mix6APlix

The more you cry, the less I care.
Oct 20, 2015
12,918
13,449
Back when I had my good dogs, stealthily came up to a fight with a bunch of kids from down the street. We went around a couple houses so we were just across the street. I smacked the ground and my dogs got low, the we watched a fight with a bunch of HS kids. it was a blast, and my dogs, as always, were awesome. Aside from a slight grumble from my Rottie, they just laid silent in the shadows with me.
 
Mix6APlix

Mix6APlix

The more you cry, the less I care.
Oct 20, 2015
12,918
13,449


This is facing north, towards my decent neighbors.



This is facing south, toward my total douchebag neighbor. I don't shovel the sidewalk to let him know that I think he is a giant fucking asshole. I would love to club him to death with, I don't know, any blunt object.

I would also love to fuck his daughter.

Edit: she is in college so it would be totally legal.
 
Leigh

Leigh

Engineer
Pro Fighter
Jan 26, 2015
10,925
21,293
My ex wife told me one day when I got home from work that a man had been looking through the window at her when she had a towel on after getting out of the shower. He apparently came into our garden and knocked on the window. She freaked out and it was just before I got there. I was mad but there was nothing I could do.

A few weeks later, we had an argument and she went into the living room. She screamed and said she saw him again. I ran out but couldn't find anyone. At this point, I'm wondering if she's made it up.

Then one day I'm in the living room with the lights off watching TV about 11pm and I see a shadow at my window. It's the guy! Cheeky cunt, thinks he can continually fuck with me wife. My door was locked and I was only in my underpants but I jump out the window and chase after him. This fucker is about 40 years old and runs. Starts shouting apologies and saying he was just using my garden as a short cut (impossible due to the lay out and where he was). I tell him to come back and we'll have a chat about it but he carries on running. I leg it after him in nothing but boxer shorts. I notice that running down the street in bare feet isn't fun.

I chase him into a dark corner and he's trapped. He turns around and I run over and leg kick him to off balance him, in case he's got a weapon. I then take him down and choke him. He seemed like quite a coward, so I tell him he's dying. He pretends to go limp but I know a limp choked out body and I don't stop. He makes one last spaz out attempt and then goes limp for real. I want to jump on the guy's head cos I have young kids in my house but I compose myself. I consider going through his wallet to find out who he is but that's probably a bad idea. I wake him up and tell him I'll kill him if I see him on my property again. He says he understands. A woman comes out of her house and asks what's going on and we both leave.

---------------------

A few weeks later I see the guy in a Chinese takeaway with a woman. He pretends not to see me. I go to the counter to order food, stand right next to him and whisper in his ear, "yes it was me." He doesn't react.
 
Mix6APlix

Mix6APlix

The more you cry, the less I care.
Oct 20, 2015
12,918
13,449
Leigh @Leigh let me tell you about my neighbor to my south.

2 things: the last time I talked to this fucker, was when I saw him dumping his fertilizer where my dogs like to lay. They both ended up with cancer. They both had long, happy lives, but I should have stabbed him that day instead of just saying "really asshole?". Literally the the words we've had.

Second this fucker called the police when I was playing with my dogs in my house. Inside my house. And this sack of shit called the police because they were barking.

Then his smug stupid ass stood outside while I asked the cop why he was even there.

I should have stabbed him then too.
 
maurice

maurice

Posting Machine
Oct 21, 2015
1,361
2,295
My childhood was similar but without the crazy outfits, and the stories are less interesting because we never got caught. Chicago mostly is laid out as a series of 25' x 125' foot fenced lots with walkways (locally called "gangways") on the side and alleys in the back to keep garbage off of the street. When we lobbed rock filled snowballs and crab apples at cars (even police cars), there was zero chance they would catch us. Cars can't drive down gangways and, at that age, we could leap fences without breaking stride. We also knew from experience which yards had big angry dogs and expertly avoided them.

The only times I was ever caught was when I didn't do anything wrong and, therefore, didn't think I needed to run.
 
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