Sports Sage Northcutt headed to the NFL

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sparkuri

Pulse On The Finger Of The Community
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Jan 16, 2015
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Asocciated Press -
In a groundbreaking move sure to send shockwaves through the sports and MMA world, the Washing. Redskinz have reportedly signed MMA superstar Sage Northcutt to a 4-year 120 BAZILLION dollar deal to play American Football for them.
Although he has no football experience whatsoever, scouts for the Redskinz have been quoted as saying, "It doesn't matter, we're the Redskinz."


Screenshot_20231020_005708.jpg
Sage Northcutt psyching out his opponent before a bout.



Defensive and offensive coordinators for the Redskinz were excited upon hearing the news Wednesday, and have thrown in their respective hats on the Sage Northcutt team lottery.
However coach Jay Gruden has a different take...

"There's no doubt Sage is a superstar in the making, but with that level of talent, it seems counterproductive to have him play for just the offense or defense.
Without an equal level of excitement to amp the team on both sides, we may become seen as either weak on offense, or weak on defense, and that's something this organization simply cannot have."


20231020_011000.jpg


Many speculate that Northcutt may play multiple positions, and don't rule out a possible Nose Tackle/punt return/Quarterback option, as all three key positions are now available, according to Washington insiders.


Sage Northcutt suited up for practice Wednesday and the stadium filled when the news broke.



The 120 bazillion dollar deal signed early Wednesday is believed to be one of the most lucrative deals signed in NFL history, at least for a 4-year contract. This seems to be a trend in the famed former UFC fighter's career, as he's already been involved in "The most anticipated fight in UFC history" a total of 4 times, as well as "The biggest fight in UFC history" twice, "The youngest person to grace the cover of Sport Karate magazine", and most recently, "The biggest upset in UFC history", bringing current historical record to 9 times in sports history, which by itself has not been done by any one sports athlete in history, bringing Sage's "in history" totals to 10.





Northcutt sending a message to the world that he has arrived, pictured here at 3 years old.




Screenshot_20231020_011724.jpg
Referee Herb Dean offers the Karate Kid relations with a willing courtesan.


UFC mega star, NFL superstar, Karate superstar, and really, really, really.....ridiculously good-looking, one has to wonder what's next for Northcutt.
Tennis?
Playboy?
Jiu-Jitsu?
The sky's truly the limit for this youngster.




Screenshot_20231020_012502.jpg
A man of many hats and faces, "Professional" Sage makes the Cut.
 
Last edited:

Hauler

Been fallin so long it's like gravitys gone
Feb 3, 2016
45,415
57,815
".......bringing current historical record to 9 times in sports history, which by itself has not been done by any one sports athlete in history, bringing Sage's "in history" totals to 10."

LMAO. That's good.
 
P

Punch

Guest
Asocciated Press -
In a groundbreaking move sure to send shockwaves through the sports and MMA world, the Washing. Redskinz have reportedly signed MMA superstar Sage Northcutt to a 4-year 120 BAZILLION dollar deal to play American Football for them.
Although he has no football experience whatsoever, scouts for the Redskinz have been quoted as saying, "It doesn't matter, we're the Redskinz."



Sage Northcutt psyching out his opponent before a bout.



Defensive and offensive coordinators for the Redskinz were excited upon hearing the news Wednesday, and have thrown in their respective hats on the Sage Northcutt team lottery.
However coach Jay Gruden has a different take...

"There's no doubt Sage is a superstar in the making, but with that level of talent, it seems counterproductive to have him play for just the offense or defense.
Without an equal level of excitement to amp the team on both sides, we may become seen as either weak on offense, or weak on defense, and that's something this organization simply cannot have."


Many speculate that Northcutt may play multiple positions, and don't rule out a possible Nose Tackle/punt return/Quarterback option, as all three key positions are now available, according to Washington insiders.



Sage Northcutt suited up for practice Wednesday and the stadium filled when the news broke.



The 120 bazillion dollar deal signed early Wednesday is believed to be one of the most lucrative deals signed in NFL history, at least for a 4-year contract. This seems to be a trend in the famed former UFC fighter's career, as he's already been involved in "The most anticipated fight in UFC history" a total of 4 times, as well as "The biggest fight in UFC history" twice, "The youngest person to grace the cover of Sport Karate magazine", and most recently, "The biggest upset in UFC history", bringing current historical record to 9 times in sports history, which by itself has not been done by any one sports athlete in history, bringing Sage's "in history" totals to 10.






Northcutt sending a message to the world that he has arrived, pictured here at 3 years old.





Sage's patented "thumbs up" as announcer Bruce Buffer's gives the "eyes down".



UFC mega star, NFL superstar, Karate superstar, and really, really, really.....ridiculously good-looking, one has to wonder what's next for Northcutt.
Tennis?
Playboy?
Jiu-Jitsu?
The sky's truly the limit for this youngster.



Sage "makes the Cutt."
You kicked me right in the feels with this one homie, but damn fine work. :D
 

Splinty

Shake 'em off
Admin
Dec 31, 2014
44,116
91,095
Sage has some huge quads man.

Probably hasn't used a chair since the age of 3. Just air sits everywhere.
 

Filthy

Iowa Wrestling Champion
Jun 28, 2016
27,507
29,834
thought NFL was Norwegian Fighting League.

he'd be a super star