General Star Wars Disney WTF

[Masato Toys]

So I've been fucked up with minor bronchitis for a few days, bought some Star Wars books to make sitting around in bed all day feeling shitty go by better.

This book was pretty cool:

The author Claudia Gray apparently is crushing it and has written 3 books all with high reviews. I bought another one of hers called BLOODLINE which takes place before Force Awakens.

Anyways, the story reads super smooth, good writer, clean stuff.

But then on page 185 out of fucking nowhere she inserts this bizarre paragraph, that has absolutely nothing to do with the story:

What? where the fuck did that come from? lol

Its so bizarrely out of place I really think the author was coerced by Disney to add it in somewhere. It really has nothing to do with anything in the book, the concept does not payout later in the story or anything. It was just added in because, - why?

I blame Disney. So creepy.

 

[Masato Toys]

The same Disney who thought it would be a good idea to spend a $$million on simulated tits - also for absolutely no reason whatsoever in the story

Shall we also explore the artistic reasoning behind the design choice of why the creature has a face that looks like an infected foreskin?

Must have been discussed in committee

 

[KWingJitsu]

So I've been fucked up with minor bronchitis for a few days, bought some Star Wars books to make sitting around in bed all day feeling shitty go by better.

This book was pretty cool:

The author Claudia Gray apparently is crushing it and has written 3 books all with high reviews. I bought another one of hers called BLOODLINE which takes place before Force Awakens.

Anyways, the story reads super smooth, good writer, clean stuff.

But then on page 185 out of fucking nowhere she inserts this bizarre paragraph, that has absolutely nothing to do with the story:

What? where the fuck did that come from? lol

Its so bizarrely out of place I really think the author was coerced by Disney to add it in somewhere. It really has nothing to do with anything in the book, the concept does not payout later in the story or anything. It was just added in because, - why?

I blame Disney. So creepy.

I suspect your suspicion is accurate as to its origin.

 

[ConorMcGregor NutHugger]

Geek Haven

 

[Masato Toys]

Another bit from that scene that had absolutely nothing to do with the story (actually hindered it imo, Luke should have been alone on that island there was no plot reason for these beings) was the caretakers, who coincidentally look just like Catholic nuns:

I know for sure that the concept art and design process for Star Wars stuff is rigorous and detailed, hiring great artists developing all the looks and details. If an artist had come up with this themselves, the production designers would have said 'why do they look like catholic nuns? and fired the guy for mocking their film. But no, it made the cut somehow.

Disney is not subtle.


It sucks so bad because Star Wars lore is otherwise so much fun to explore.

 

[Masato Toys]

Geek Haven

This thread is not really about Star Wars, its about propaganda in media

 

[steroid to heaven]

sjw stuff must die

 

[Masato Toys]

sjw stuff must die

So must your avatar.

I’d rather see a foreskin faced 4 titted alien.

great username though, lol

 

[Masato Toys]

Maybe the author is trans?

I watched an interview with her before I read the book, she seemed perfectly natural at the time

 

[Rambo John J]

Another bit from that scene that had absolutely nothing to do with the story (actually hindered it imo, Luke should have been alone on that island there was no plot reason for these beings) was the caretakers, who coincidentally look just like Catholic nuns:

I know for sure that the concept art and design process for Star Wars stuff is rigorous and detailed, hiring great artists developing all the looks and details. If an artist had come up with this themselves, the production designers would have said 'why do they look like catholic nuns? and fired the guy for mocking their film. But no, it made the cut somehow.

Disney is not subtle.


It sucks so bad because Star Wars lore is otherwise so much fun to explore.

haha
those are cute
doesn't make sense as a creature tho

 

[Masato Toys]

haha
those are cute
doesn't make sense as a creature tho

I think it's a dig on the Catholic church (they burn the Temple, get rid of the old, etc)

Which is something I might otherwise agree with, but I wouldn't write it so blatantly into a Star Wars movie lol

Those caretakers are not needed in the plot and could have looked like anything. In fact if you get 100 of the top concept artists in the world to design their vision of a caretaker race of an ancient Jedi temple, I fucking guarantee zero of them would design something like that lol - They already had the cute little furball things, no need for a second species just for cutes sake. I really think these things are inserted like the paragraph in the Leia book for some twisted shit.

And seriously how did that tits scene make it into the film? Can you imagine how the creative meetings with producers etc must have gone?

I remember reading how the script was way too long and they had to mercilessly cut stuff out to get it down to a reasonable length - I also know that good screenwriting means taking shit out that the story doesn't need, etc.

Yet somehow, the majority of the top creatives, at the top of their game, with Billions of dollars invested, all came to the final consensus that it was absolutely essential to include a graphic close up scene of Luke grabbing and milking a creature's exposed tits.

And oh yeah lets make the creatures face look like a foreskin with an STD. Kids will love that.

 

[Rambo John J]

I think it's a dig on the Catholic church (they burn the Temple, get rid of the old, etc)

Which is something I might otherwise agree with, but I wouldn't write it into a Star Wars movie lol
Those caretakers are not needed in the plot and could have looked like anything. They already had the cute little furball things, no need for a second species just for cutes sake. I really think these things are inserted like the paragraph in the Leia book for some twisted shit.

Seriously how did that tits scene make it into the film? Can you imagine how the creative meetings with producers etc must have gone?

I remember reading how the script was way too long and they had to mercilessly cut stuff out to get it down to a reasonable length - I also know that good screenwriting means taking shit out that the story doesn't need, etc.

Yet somehow, the majority of the top creatives, at the top of their game, with Billions of dollars invested, all came to the final consensus that it was absolutely essential to include a graphic close up scene of Luke grabbing and milking a creature's exposed tits.

I stopped watching the new Star Wars when I saw the jar jar binks, from then on I knew I would just watch the original 3.

The tits scene I did watch a short clip of...how humiliating for luke...they wrote in a fuck you drink from tits of jabba hut's mom scene.

so bad hahahaha

 

[Masato Toys]

I stopped watching the new Star Wars when I saw the jar jar binks, from then on I knew I would just watch the original 3.

The tits scene I did watch a short clip of...how humiliating for luke...they wrote in a fuck you buddy joke scene.

so bad hahahaha

Good for you for quitting

I have been tempted many times but can't bring myself to do it, I still find the idea of having such a deep lore of a single concept fascinating. Good star wars is super fun, even if some films are poorly done the overall story and canon is still cool to explore.

That's why it sucks so bad that Disney is now at the helm, and has to keep taking its dick out and flailing it around while we try to enjoy

I'm actually hoping Episode 9 will have like a pedo scene it it or something so I can walk out and be done with it lol

 

[Masato Toys]

FINN: "We're going to an ancient Jedi Training school? That is dope!"

Finn watches some of the planet's lifeforms ass-fucking eachother as they continue down the trail. The creatures are adorably cute, but with huge oversized rainbow colored assholes. Several other creatures penetrate it vigorously.

KYLO: So it turns out, all of the most powerful Jedi Masters of the ancient order were both genders! Some actually had 2 different functioning sets of genitals! or more...

REY: That sounds great!

FINN: Yeah, can you believe that some people would actually not be cool with that? I'd be totally cool with that!

Suddenly, BLASTER FIRE emerges from the alien foliage. Rey, Finn, and Kylo take cover.

 

[RaginCajun]

 

[otaku1]

Star wars has been fucked by Disney big time.

They hired hacks like Ryan Johnson and overhyped lens flare dude from Lost to direct the first two.
Shitty screenwriting :
They made that chick to be an unstoppable Jedi with no training or barely. Knows how to pilot the falcon better than a dude who owned it for most of his life (solo) because... Women are better duh.
Didn't respect Lukes character at all and his legacy/ meaning in the whole Star wars universe.
The test screenings have been pretty disastrous as per all the info leaked on YouTube.
They're so desperate that they finally decided to call in George Lucas for a solution... After pretty much ignoring his vision for the new trilogy once they bought him off.

There's so many things wrong the list is too fuckin long

This dude nails it

View: https://youtu.be/ruxcT6LEVzk

 

[otaku1]

Worth mentioning Mark Hamill verbal gymnastics during the last Jedis promotion interviews.
You can tell he's biting his tongue but he's left a few hints at his disappointment and frustration.

 

[Rambo John J]

Worth mentioning Mark Hamill verbal gymnastics during the last Jedis promotion interviews.
You can tell he's biting his tongue but he's left a few hints at his disappointment and frustration.

He was the star of the only real star wars movies.
He knows it.

Just needed another cash bump

 

[Masato Toys]

Yeah they trashed Luke’s character completely. Made him a selfish pouty whiner.

I am not satisfied to chalk it all up to incompetence.

 

[Masato Toys]

He was the star of the only real star wars movies.
He knows it.

Just needed another cash bump

I disagree about the cash bump. Hamill strikes me a a bit vain, he loves his character and the Star Wars fandom. I think he was genuinely happy to bring the role back. But yeah everything I’ve seen so far tells he wasn’t happy with the result.

 

[otaku1]

Yeah they trashed Luke’s character completely. Made him a selfish pouty whiner.

I am not satisfied to chalk it all up to incompetence.

Bad and stupid corporate woke philosophy took over proper storytelling.

 

[Disciplined Galt]

Saw the first one of the new trilogy, couldn’t stand and sure not going back for more.

 

[otaku1]

Bwahahahaha
Mark Hamill giving advice
Ouch


View: https://youtu.be/ibWDvp6qPQw

 

[Masato Toys]

Star wars has been fucked by Disney big time.

They hired hacks like Ryan Johnson and overhyped lens flare dude from Lost to direct the first two.
Shitty screenwriting :
They made that chick to be an unstoppable Jedi with no training or barely. Knows how to pilot the falcon better than a dude who owned it for most of his life (solo) because... Women are better duh.
Didn't respect Lukes character at all and his legacy/ meaning in the whole Star wars universe.
The test screenings have been pretty disastrous as per all the info leaked on YouTube.
They're so desperate that they finally decided to call in George Lucas for a solution... After pretty much ignoring his vision for the new trilogy once they bought him off.

There's so many things wrong the list is too fuckin long

This dude nails it

View: https://youtu.be/ruxcT6LEVzk

just watched a bunch of that guys vids trashing the last Jedi.

he’s right


Maybe enough to finally get me off this infested wagon

 

[Masato Toys]

Also just realized those weren’t the alien’s tits. After rewatching the scene you can see that whatever Luke was ‘milking’ from is clearly directly in the creatures’ genital region.

wtf

I don’t understand

this is beyond just fans like me complaining we didn’t get the perfect movie, this is sheer calculated cultural perversion. So bizarre.