The Ex-Girlfriend Thread

[Lamont Cranston]

Those of you who know me from teh OG know that in my past I was not always prime boyfriend material. In fact, after I got married I have spent a good deal of time righting the wrongs I did in past relationships when the opportunity arose.

I simply did this by saying I am sorry, accepting responsibility for my actions and part in the relationships, and not blaming them for anything they may have done. I know it takes 2 to tango but it was in the past and I felt it was best to ignore the bad and start fresh and apologize to start that process.

I recently had a sad outcome from this but 98% of the time it turns out that as a functional adult most of the time it results in a new relationship that has positive outcome.

So, in the spirit of that instead of posting about your ex-gf and the shitty things that went on with it, if you want to post in this thread you have to post about what went wrong, and how it has come around since to be a positive.

If you can't do that, then go ahead and post about a messed up past relationship and the rest of us can figure out if it can be resolved or if you should just leave it the %$#@ alone.

 

[Leigh]

I cheated on all my ex girlfriends. I have come to learn it was insecurity and addressing it has obviously really benefited my marriage

 

[sgotwalks]

I'm 45 and there have really only been 2 ladies in my life since I was 15. I've had some action with a number of other girls throughout those years in between but nothing I would qualify as a girlfriend. Of those 2 who I have had relationships with, my wife who I have been married to for nearly 19 years now, and my first serious girlfriend who I went out with for about 7 years. I lived with that girl's family in high school for a couple years and remain in close contact with all of them to this day. Nothing to see here folks, no horror stories.

Ha! I just broke all the rules of this thread. See, I am capable of being an asshole, just not with my ladies.

 

[Splinty]

She was immature and an attention whore. I was a beta bitch that enabled that behavior. We both failed to grow as neither broke up with the other or communicated our wants. All her fault? No way. Had I set boundaries and communicated maybe she would have been able to grow inside the relationship instead of us breaking up in a childish manner later on. Would have never worked out long term, but could have been better for us both with us both acting differently.

Now I'm much more direct, communicate with my wife, etc.

 

[ThatOneDude]

My first real girl friend who I lost my virginity to was a spoiled first generation off the boat Italian. She was super needy and was upset that I was going to miss her homecoming for a football game..... I promptly told her to be quite and it was over..... We hooked up every year for the next 9 years.....

 

[Wintermute]

All I'll say is, "Crazy in the bed, crazy in the head."

 

[ThatOneDude]

All I'll say is, "Crazy in the bed, crazy in the head."

But crazy in bed is sooooooooooooooooo much fun

 

[Wild]

About 6 of them are mothers of kids that my kids go to the same school with. Parent functions at the school are always fun when my wife and I attend.

 

[ThatOneDude]

About 6 of them are mothers of kids that my kids go to the same school with. Parent functions at the school are always fun when my wife and I attend.

Any good stories?

 

[Wild]

Any good stories?

Not really. I told my wife about them all early on, so there wasn't any secrets. One girls son has a crush on my daughter and my daughter cant stand him lol. Only time it ever got awkward was when one came right up to me, and was like "heyyyyy! How are you?!" and gave me a big hug with my wife standing there. My wife is confident as hell and just said "you two catch up" and went wherever. I just kept it short and sweet. and got back to my wife asap lol.

 

[Lamont Cranston]

I cheated on all my ex girlfriends. I have come to learn it was insecurity and addressing it has obviously really benefited my marriage

I was not a great BF. I will admit to that.

However, one day i just got tired of my own actions and just stopped dating for 6 months because I didn't like what I was doing, I changed my attitude and within 6 months I met me future First Wife.

Growing up can be awesome.

 

[OhWhopDaChamp]

Me & my homie (bff/gf) broke up after hanging solid every day for a year because she kept saying I flirted with her dudes silently from across the room with my eyes and body language. About a year later we tried to make up and took X together.
We ended up dyking with each other and she had a big bushel of pubic hair. I left the next morning and never saw her again.
She did find my Facebook and we exchanged pleasantries. I wrote about this story, she read it & went away. Hope she went away to go shave her twat.
That's all I got girlfriend wise. Old story.

 

[lueVelvet]

I dated my first GF for more than 12 years and lived with her for 3/4 of that. In hindsight I realized that we were extremely emotionally co-dependent on each other from the beginning making it extremely difficult to address any potentially wave making topics and taboos. I had to move 1500 miles away to truly separate myself from the situation to see that it wasn't just her or me but both of us were feeding each other's insecurities and emotional co-dependance and that what we really needed was that time apart. I want to say all ill will has been forgotten but I'm not so sure on her end. The last few times I spoke with her she still seemed mildly resentful though cordial.

One thing I learned was that it never really helps to lie about anything and to be brutally (yet politely) honest. When I took this approach, it really helped my friendship with my ex and with my current relationship. I also learned how to limit my emotional depdance and I now understand that I can't invest every last drop of myself in anyone. I encourage my current partner to do the same. We're so different yet we keep each other balanced in a strange way. No topic is taboo and everything is out on the table, the way it should be.

 

[2JupitersTooMany]

I have been married three times, all of them crazy, of course, and it has nothing to do with me, obviously.

*packs entire catalog of belongings into back seat of 1991 Honda Civic*

 

[OhWhopDaChamp]

I have been married three times, all of them crazy, of course, and it has nothing to do with me, obviously.

*packs entire catalog of belongings into back seat of 1991 Honda Civic*

What brings you to propose marriage? Pressure? Religion? Thought it was true love?

 

[2JupitersTooMany]

What brings you to propose marriage? Pressure? Religion? Thought it was true love?

The first was a high school sweetheart, ending in a practiced religious guilt over violating my sacred vows, so when I latched onto #2, an unstable firefighter deviant type, I wanted to make an honest woman of her and spent my life savings on a ring as some sort of penance and irreversible life sentence in a filthy jail where I figured I belonged. The third, I can't tell you. Force of habit, probably. I can't even remember exactly how it happened.

 

[OhWhopDaChamp]

The first was a high school sweetheart, ending in a practiced religious guilt over violating my sacred vows, so when I latched onto #2, an unstable firefighter deviant type, I wanted to make an honest woman of her and spent my life savings on a ring as some sort of penance and irreversible life sentence in a filthy jail where I figured I belonged. The third, I can't tell you. Force of habit, probably. I can't even remember exactly how it happened.

Are you open to marrying a forth time or are you tapping out?

 

[ThatOneDude]

I had this one gf, man was she a persistent cunt. After I kicked her to the curb a 2nd time she just couldn't let go. It got really creepy online, everytime someone would post anything that could some how be twisted to being related to me she would go off on these creepy fucking rants. To this day she still can't fucking drop it, I feel bad for her.

 

[2JupitersTooMany]

Are you open to marrying a forth time or are you tapping out?

I think marriage is a ridiculous religious institution that serves no purpose but to create property rights and health insurance eligibility etc. and I am keen on being a nomad. But the reality is, if some wild damsel came around and I thought she was worth it and it meant a lot to her to undergo the formality, I would probably be dumb enough to do it again.

 

[IschKabibble]

she had a big bushel of pubic hair

 

[girlandcoconut]

I think marriage is a ridiculous religious institution that serves no purpose but to create property rights and health insurance eligibility etc. and I am keen on being a nomad. But the reality is, if some wild damsel came around and I thought she was worth it and it meant a lot to her to undergo the formality, I would probably be dumb enough to do it again.

What he said.

 

[OhWhopDaChamp]

What he said.

huh. I'm not religious at all, not anti religion I just don't believe, but I value marriage as a promise. If I ever promise someone it'll be just me, him, & Pookie Law. I don't want anyone in my personal business and a marriage promise is the most personal thing I can think of.

 

[OhWhopDaChamp]

I had this one gf, man was she a persistent cunt. After I kicked her to the curb a 2nd time she just couldn't let go. It got really creepy online, everytime someone would post anything that could some how be twisted to being related to me she would go off on these creepy fucking rants. To this day she still can't fucking drop it, I feel bad for her.

So you have no desire to inquire what about your previous situation/interaction bothered or hurt her so much she can't get past it? Or does she act this way toward all of her previous companions? Basically are you willing to self reflect?

 

[Lamont Cranston]

Been married twice. Best thing I ever did.