Raising kids when parents have differing religious beliefs

[Lord Vutulaki]

Then get out now. It's not going to get any better.

lolz

 

[Disciplined Galt]

The way of Diogenes is easy my boomerang throwing fren.

 

[Lord Vutulaki]

The way of Diogenes is easy my boomerang throwing fren.

Shall we begin?

@

 

[Disciplined Galt]

Why?

 

[check it]

@Sweat Tea

I have a similar situation I'll tell you about my deal, but I'm traveling and only on my phone. Its too much to text in.

 

[Ted Williams' head]

lol wow what a mess. Why did you marry someone who was nuts about a religion that you weren't into? Did that cause issues before you were married?

My chick hates religion even more than I do, it's beautiful.

 

[mysticmac]

If she is going to push a particular religion on your kids, try to educate your kids about a variety of religions (as well as atheism) so they can eventually make their own decision.

 

[Darqnezz]

Heaven & Heathens don't mix...lol

 

[ECC170]

damn, talk about a predicament...you should have her watch Rogans bit about Noahs Ark...hate joe or love him that was brilliant imho...,i don't wanna offend ppl who are Christians but fuck im over hearing about a book written by Man that when things they can't explain.pop up they say "faith" is the answer...oh well, its annoying to have ppl pushing religion on me A LOT and it Gets's tiresome....I think of when david blaine goes to third world counties and shocks the ppl and they think hes some kind of "god" when its just that they are ignorant to know its all bogus magic...

I think i there was a jesus he worked in similar ways and confused ignorant ppl...I just get tired of bible beaters acting like they know how "god" thinks or how im going to Hell for not going and giving my money to some con artist old fuck who drives 10 cars and is crooked most of the time...if there's a "god", i dint think not going to a money pit cult singing dumbass songs will be the reason i dont get into "heaven"..

 

[1031]

My honest advice would be just to go with the flow. It won't kill them to get some moral bearing and exposure to an aspect of their mother's cultural heritage at the same time. Involving others will only make this worse. Don't refer to your wife with derogatory words, even in harmless writing like on this forum. It's tempting, I know but as a separated man, I know that things started to get really bad when I allowed myself to feed the negative energy my wife was giving me with my own negativity. It's poison brother, trust me.
You can outsmart, outlast and mitigate the degree to which going to church affects your kids.

 

[Qat]

The problem is if you divorce her, in her time she will take the kids to her church. You can't control that I reckon.
Seems to me you are in the right here. That doesn't always 'win' though.. shit situation.

The first step to hell you probably took when you married her. Can't really give you a good tip, but I can share your pain about Korean women, albeit not directly.

So I lived together in a shared apartment with my best buddy at the time, when his brain or his cock, or I'm not sure what exactly decided to get together with this she-devil of a Korean girl.
First I thought she was okay, and it was even possible to hold a conversation with her, even though she was very shy around a group of people, but became the final boss when you were alone with her.
That got old pretty fast.

At some point she decided not to like me or something. She basically ruined our friendship. Apparently I had a bad influence on him and so forth. And well, her pussy won.
All the while she was basically living in our apartment and using my shit all over, not paying a dime. I kept it drama-free though, I had some conversations with him about it, since I knew he would become her dog, but he didn't want to see it or change it. Never had a fight with her myself. We avoided each other.

And damn they are strangely strict in their ways regarding family and traditions.
So she was 20+ but still lived with her parents and was not allowed to sleep somewhere else. So what did she do? She lived in our apartment and went home at night only to sleep there, and came back in the morning. How fucking stupid is that?
All the while her sister, who is younger than her, lived in another town, and slept away from home every day, right? But damn you for finding logic in that. And that's only one example, a strange family in my opinion.
Needless to say, my buddy was protestant as well, but wasn't practising for shit nor did believe in it. Then he started reading the Bible and went to church with her. Thumbs up.

I never had my gfs stay that close or had them practically living in our apartment for months, nor did he do that with his girls before her, that shit is crazy in itself. He had zero room for himself, zero. And it seemed to me that she always made a point of not getting along with any of my girls or other friends either. The atmosphere in our apartment just went to shit basically.
So for me, this Korean girl is a controlling piece of shit who ruined a good friendship I had, while invading my space and using my shit without any second thoughts.

Bro-fist for hate on Korean women, buddy. Although I'm sure they are not all like that.

 

[Leigh]

Point to take away from what I reckon is that relationships are fucking tricky.

Honestly, they shouldn't be. You need to make considerations and support each other but regular arguments are not the sign of a healthy relationship.

My honest advice would be just to go with the flow. It won't kill them to get some moral bearing and exposure to an aspect of their mother's cultural heritage at the same time.

Religion is not necessary to learn morals. Also, I don't think an Australian church is really representative of Korean culture.

 

[Sweets]

Religion is not necessary to learn morals.

#winner

 

[ThatOneDude]

#winner

I agree man, I kind of feel if you need the fear of an imaginary friend to be a good person, there's a decent chance you're a piece of shit at the core.

 

[Sweets]

I agree man, I kind of feel if you need the fear of an imaginary friend to be a good person, there's a decent chance you're a piece of shit at the core.

I wouldn't go that far personally. I do have a problem with the idea that religion somehow has a monopoly on morality; as if morality is not innate to the human condition. Just like violence or anything else on the spectrum of our behaviour

 

[ThatOneDude]

I wouldn't go that far personally. I do have a problem with the idea that religion somehow has a monopoly on morality; as if morality is not innate to the human condition. Just like violence or anything else on the spectrum of our behaviour

I get what you are saying. I just think fear is a shitty reason to do good.

 

[Sweets]

I get what you are saying. I just think fear is a shitty reason to do good.

Honesty I have never been around religious people, but from my outside observation fear of he'll isn't the major motivating factor most people seem to treat their god as a therapist in the modern era

 

[ThatOneDude]

Honesty I have never been around religious people, but from my outside observation fear of he'll isn't the major motivating factor most people seem to treat their god as a therapist in the modern era

Ehhhhh, hasn't been my experience alot of times

 

[BWS]

DOESN'T REALLY MATTER WHAT RELIGION YOU PUSH ON THEM...........THEY WILL EVENTUALLY MAKE THEIR OWN CHOICES ON WHAT TO BELIEVE ONCE THEY GET OLDER. NO BIG DEAL. JUST MAKE SURE YOU ARE RAISING GOOD KIDS.......THATS WHATS IMPORTANT.

 

[Sweets]

Ehhhhh, hasn't been my experience alot of times

Ye you guys do seem a bit brimstone crazy

 

[ThatOneDude]

Ye you guys do seem a bit brimstone crazy

Whoa whoa whoa, what's this "you guys" talk lol
Yea the hell fire and brimstone shit makes me laugh, fucking dummies.

 

[1031]

Honestly, they shouldn't be. You need to make considerations and support each other but regular arguments are not the sign of a healthy relationship.


Religion is not necessary to learn morals. Also, I don't think an Australian church is really representative of Korean culture.

I didn't mean to imply that it was but spending time with their mother at a Korean church can be looked at as a good thing in more ways than not. imo :/
And I agree with you about the arguing i.e. that's not part of a healthy relationship.

 

[1031]

I get what you are saying. I just think fear is a shitty reason to do good.

I'd rather be around people that treat one another with respect and compassion regardless of their moral compass, even it it's born out of fear. It's like enjoying the affection of an incredibly beautiful woman who's chosen to be good to me just because she's afraid of being alone, I may not see her point of view but I'll be damned if I don't encourage it.

 

[Lamont Cranston]

FRAT Warning (scroll to bottom for non FRAT version)

I want to get a broader perspective on an issue that has once again reared its ugly head in my family life.

Background; My wife is a Korean Protestant, she is in my estimation batshit insane about it, thinks she has a special audience with God and that her pastor is the earthly conduit. Bitch thought Catholics killed Jesus until I pointed out the "Catholics" in the Passion of the Christ are in fact Jews and that Catholics werent an itch in God's nut sack at the time his son walked the earth on water.

Im a follower of my own hybridized version of Hinduism/Buddhism, I eat beef like no one else, dont observe any religious festivities, dont pray I just basically believe in karma and that shit will bite me in the ass if I dont do the right thing on this earth.

When Mrs Sweat Tea was preggas with our first we agreed that the kids would not be indoctrinated in either faith and that when they are old enough to learn and decide for themselves (CIRCA 16ish) which the cunt has now conveniently forgotten (again)

Every few months at she goes nuts claiming we cant be a family unless the kids attend church with her a couple of times a week and threatens divorce (lol bitch please). She has told the kids she cant live with us unless they are Christian and told them they are going to hell. She has told me me and my family (who carry her financially) are going to hell too.

Then she calms down and stops talking about it for a few months. Ive even offered to compromise and attend a multicultural church once a week for an hour like normal church goers do but apparently the Koreans are the only ones who believe in the right brand of Christianity and that we need to go to a Korean language service where she is a "cell group leader" hahaha cant work FT job but is a "leader"

This has reared its head again today, Im now considering taking her to the family law courts and getting a ruling on it which will be in my favor 99%.
Anyone had any experience with this directly or indirectly? any advice? not nec legal but any ideas are warmly welcomed

*********************************************NON FRAT***********************************************************

Wife is using emotional blackmail and ultimatums to try and convert the kids and I into Christians, kids aged 6 & 8 and I are not interested.

Good luck and I hope that things work out for your kids best interests.

 

[ThatOneDude]

I'd rather be around people that treat one another with respect and compassion regardless of their moral compass, even it it's born out of fear. It's like enjoying the affection of an incredibly beautiful woman who's chosen to be good to me just because she's afraid of being alone, I may not see her point of view but I'll be damned if I don't encourage it.

I donno man, intent is everything for me. Why can't you just be a good person, why must you be a good person out of fear.