I was got friendzoned before being friendzoned was an actual thing. It was the girl who gave me my Rottweiler. No pics of her, fuck off if you think about asking. But the puppy:
I would have, and did quite frankly, anything for her. She called me at 6am telling me she had a flat tire, I went and changed her tire. She was 30 minutes or so away, and that's I 80 time, not just some leisurely sideroad drive.
But the the problem always was that she was about 5'10 or so. And so am I. By no means was she a big girl, (although she had curves everywhere you would want them) but she always felt the need to be with someone who was 6'4 or 6'5, so she could feel like a dainty little flower. I was never going to be that. She also didn't take shit from anyone. Remember me saying I hooked up with my best friends girl in the biggest scumbag moment of my life? Well, they were best friends. They went to Mexico, actually I have 2 stories about them.
First, she had my Rott's littermate brother. He was a cute dog too, but also not nearly as controlled as my baby. (Not everyone communicates with animals like I do, no shame in that, I am truly exceptional) One day me and, um, I'll just say the brunette (the chick who gave me my dog) and the blonde (Not quite then my friend's girl) for reference.
We go hiking at Starved Rock and the blonde almost instantly starts complaining that her flip flops are making her feet sore. The brunette is utterly furious. Literally yells at her 'We're hiking in canyons. Why the fuck are you wearing flip flops?' So we are only there for an hour or so. It's an hour + drive. Total waste of time.
But the Rotts are running wild, off leash, just running through the woods. My rott is chasing hers, and he never watched where he was running because he was always watching his six as they ran about. He took the blonde chick out in spectacular fashion. Just ran straight through her leg, and dropped her on her head.
The brunette simply took a knee while laughing her ass off. Good times.
Next story: I will keep this short, since I wasn't there, but these 2 went to Mexico together. One night the blonde had a bit too much tequila, and could barely walk home. So the brunette drops her on the sidewalk about 2 blocks from the hotel and tells her to get a grip, then walks to the hotel.
Brunette was awesome. Blonde was pretty cool too. But, the brunette, I wish I was 6'4 and shit....but I'm not. It's one of my life's greatest defeats.
I would have, and did quite frankly, anything for her. She called me at 6am telling me she had a flat tire, I went and changed her tire. She was 30 minutes or so away, and that's I 80 time, not just some leisurely sideroad drive.
But the the problem always was that she was about 5'10 or so. And so am I. By no means was she a big girl, (although she had curves everywhere you would want them) but she always felt the need to be with someone who was 6'4 or 6'5, so she could feel like a dainty little flower. I was never going to be that. She also didn't take shit from anyone. Remember me saying I hooked up with my best friends girl in the biggest scumbag moment of my life? Well, they were best friends. They went to Mexico, actually I have 2 stories about them.
First, she had my Rott's littermate brother. He was a cute dog too, but also not nearly as controlled as my baby. (Not everyone communicates with animals like I do, no shame in that, I am truly exceptional) One day me and, um, I'll just say the brunette (the chick who gave me my dog) and the blonde (Not quite then my friend's girl) for reference.
We go hiking at Starved Rock and the blonde almost instantly starts complaining that her flip flops are making her feet sore. The brunette is utterly furious. Literally yells at her 'We're hiking in canyons. Why the fuck are you wearing flip flops?' So we are only there for an hour or so. It's an hour + drive. Total waste of time.
But the Rotts are running wild, off leash, just running through the woods. My rott is chasing hers, and he never watched where he was running because he was always watching his six as they ran about. He took the blonde chick out in spectacular fashion. Just ran straight through her leg, and dropped her on her head.
The brunette simply took a knee while laughing her ass off. Good times.
Next story: I will keep this short, since I wasn't there, but these 2 went to Mexico together. One night the blonde had a bit too much tequila, and could barely walk home. So the brunette drops her on the sidewalk about 2 blocks from the hotel and tells her to get a grip, then walks to the hotel.
Brunette was awesome. Blonde was pretty cool too. But, the brunette, I wish I was 6'4 and shit....but I'm not. It's one of my life's greatest defeats.
