So Handsome Dick Mantoba opens it up with a pro wrestling rant involving Vern Gagne, Dick The Bruiser and Haystack Calhoun "they're all going under the thunder of Manitoba" then the song kicks into gear
Two Tub Man
Two tub man
I am a pilgrim looking for danger
I am an outlaw, I am a stranger
I'm just a clown walking down the street
I think Lou Reed is a creep
I need a girl I need release
I can go anywhere, people look and people stare
They all know that I'm the one, not to let your son become
What I want to do I do, who I want to screw I screw
Playin' in a heavy band, guess I'm just a two tub man
I drink coca cola for breakfast
I've got Jackie Onassis in my pants
I'm never gonna watch channel thirteen
Edjumacation ain't for me
I'm so drunk I can barely see
I can go anywhere, people look and people stare
They all know that I'm the one, not to let your son become
What I want to do I do, who I want to screw I screw
Playin' in a heavy band, guess I'm just a two tub man
I never graduated from high school
I wore paisley I was too cool
I think color TV's a gas
I think Joe Franklin is real flash
I don't mind if I gotta kick your ass
I can go anywhere, people look and people stare
They all know that I'm the one, not to let your son become
What I want to do I do, who I want to screw I screw
Playin' in a heavy band, guess I'm just a two tub man
View: https://youtu.be/xFud9f9t3gM