Discussion in 'The Off-topic Lounge' started by Sex Chicken, Dec 18, 2018.
I'm just chilling on a beach and sucking down sangria like it's my fucking job.
You're on the right coast for that. Wise choice. When I want to stay at the beach for a few days I head over there or Singer Island over here. The beaches in Broward and Dade are packed with shitholers and just crowded, parking sucks etc etc. South of you Ft. Meyers isn't bad either.
Come about 9 pm I'm the only fucker out here.
Miles of beach and ocean. It's pretty cool.
Tampa is shitty and dirty but the gulf coast has the nicest beaches in the state.
I normally warn people that it's mostly full of old people but you'll fit right in.
Why the hell would you come to Florida in the summer?
Oh fuck off.
Right? My wife's friend has a time share down here. So I come down every now and then and get shitfaced for a few days.
I haven't showered in 3 days and I'm still the most sophisticated motherfucker in this shit-hole state.
Don’t eat the yellow sand Mr. Sofistication
Is that the sand tainted with meth?
You realize you came down here to swim in fish shit and piss. Also pay for the privilege. Who’s laughing at who?
I'm laughing at everyone.
You’re on vacation enjoy it. I run everyday with a sweatshirt. Today was not a good day. It was so damn hot I was hurting. How is it there? Must be like a boiler on the beach.
It was fucking miserable outside, which means my store was just as hot. Our AC is fucked.
I was sweating out of the shower. I hate that.
A good breeze so it felt OK.
I spent half the morning questioning if I really did shower. I’m inside. It’s lame to be sweating.
We have the friendliest squirrels in the nation
must be nice to have some beach weather . this is 20 mins up the highway from me
So my wife took my kids to the lake yesterday and left me in town alone. I had planned to by a 26, now my lawn, clean up the weeds, do some housework and relax with a few stiff drinks afterwards.
That didn’t happen.
I talked to a friend in the morning and he and another friend had almost got into a fight the night before and he was pretty upset. I called him later on in the day to see if he wanted me to pick him up on my way home from work so we could have a drink at my place and relax. He was down and came over.
I had planned to shave my head and shower as soon as we got home but the dude who he had almost got into with called and came over.
Then shit went unexpectedly sideways but not because of them.
A friend of my friend stopped by who had mushrooms, acid, mdma, mda, dmt and some weed with him.
Good news, I stayed away from the dmt.
I hadn’t had any mushrooms for five years so I decided it would be a swell idea to slam back and eighth and chase it with a 66 of rye. I also bought some acid (which I haven’t touched in 20 years).
So, I had a killer night with a bunch of my friends who I hadn’t planned on having over. I looked at my table at midnight and there were more than 10 different illegal substances along with multiple alcoholic beverages splayed across it.
All I had wanted was to mow my lawn and relax alone.
I went to bed at 6am and left a few dudes outside in my gazebo (like the gods they are cleaned and washed everything up before leaving). I got up at 8 and mowed my lawn, did my yard work (while stumbling around and sweating like a whore in church). Had a drink after I was done and in my infinite fucking wisdom decided to toss back a hit of acid before going to bed.
Yup. I did that.
Forgot about it when I woke up.
Until I started to try to get up to piss.
So, I dropped some acid for the first time in twenty years, sometime around 10am before going back to bed, woke up tripping balls and it’s date night for my wife who’s stone cold sober and hates drugs of all kinds.
If I don’t end up in a tour bus in my underwear singing tiny dancer I think it’ll be alright.
Forgot I took Hess pictures last night.
ThAt one mushroom stalk weighed 8 grams and was 6 inches long
This dragon tooth looking thing was about 3 grams
So far so good.
those do look like dinosaur fossils