*by*, not “buy”Three midgets: @sparkuri, @Robbie Hart and @Andrewsimar Palhardass are hanging out together, bored, and one of them notices a Guinness Book of World Records on the shelf. They occupy their time for a little bit by looking at all of the records, and they have the great idea that they should all try to break one.
@sparkuri looks at his hands and says "guys, I think I might be able to break the record for having the world's smallest fingers!
@Robbie Hart thinks for a while and says "I bet I could win for having the smallest feet ever!"
@Andrewsimar Palhardass says, ashamed and excited at the same time, "guys, I hate to say this but I bet I've got the smallest penis in history."
They call up Guinness and set it up, and finally the day comes.
@sparkuri goes into the room with the Guinness rep, and emerges with a certificate. "I can't believe it, guys! I have the smallest hands in history!"
@Robbie Hart is next. A few minutes go buy and he says "Guys, it was close... but I have the smallest head ever!" he's jumping for joy with his certificate.
@Andrewsimar Palhardass is nervous. He can't be the only one without a record. He goes in to the room, and he's in there for a long time. He finally emerges, but he has tears in his face. Sparkuri and Robbie ask in anticipation, did he break the record? Andrewsimar looks up, devastated, and cries "WHO THE HELL IS @Splinty ?!?!?"